Vantage point/Juan

So I get up in the morning on 10/22/08 debating in my head what I will do for my wife, or really what will I get her for our 12^th anniversary. I had a couple of spies know as Agent Van pelt, & Agent DigiSal trying to figure out what I can get the LAW as I call her. Had been planning for about a month in advance, at one time I was considering to get her a treadmill so she can walk at home, but I can already hear her, “You know what I can do with that money”. Well I was going back & forth on a lot of things the IPhone for example, but she ended getting that one on her own, so I was back to square one. Then Agent Van Pelt suggested a purse that DigiSal had for sale, don’t ask me where he got it from he said he used it once only, so you know, don’t ask don’t tell, hehe. So DigiSal & I are emailing back & forth ok maybe once or twice. Well the day had come the day before our anniversary & yes I had nothing not even a card, so I was terrified I know my wife don’t care if I get her anything, but just to make her feel special I still have to get her something, I mean come on look at me, & look at her she got robbed in this transaction. Well I call her up from work to tell her lets have lunch at the Mall, so she agrees, of course she is bringing little David he is already out of school. As we eat some Chinese food, I tell her I confess all the planning for nothing I told her I would get her a perfume, so while we are eating & talking she tells me she saw Pastor Mark & Sis Kim as they were leaving the mall, they said hi to each other then went on their separate ways, Sis Kim tells her, “I just saw Lucy here she was leaving when we got here. So we finish lunch go to get the perfume, & like always my wife is Nah we can go look for it cheaper somewhere else, but I would have none of that, so I bought it & got my self some cologne also. I told her we were even we got each other something and there we were done. I gave her a kiss, & came back to work. Then I still felt I needed to get her something else, BECAUSE you know how women are, & ask , “what did he get you? I didn’t want her to say some perfume. So after work I went to the mall got her an anklet & a card, couldn’t wait to give it to her, I always tend to ruin the surprise, & cant wait to give it to her , but this time I waited. I kept it in the truck hoping they wouldn’t break into my truck & steal it since I have the DVD player in there & all my tools. I also placed a pen on the porch to write in the card when I had a chance to get away. So we are off to church, service was great stepping all over the toes of everyone, with the 7 deadly sins. After church we are outside talking like usual, talking with the women about perfumes then I see J, in the distance looking puzzled so I walk over there to see what’s up, but nothing is going on as I ask, he is watching the kids throw the football around when all of a sudden we here a yell screaming, “it’s a BUG” well it was Adri she was caring Adrian, & I guess a bug flew on her or something, then J decides to leave so, I said, “ok man see you later”. I think he was going to see Robs little girl. I see Adri leave a little bit after that. So I go into the car waiting on the Law to get in because we decide not to go out to eat since we were going to walk later that night. As I am sitting in the car, because women have twice even three times more words than men, we just grunt after we are out of words, but no matter I am waiting in the car patiently mind you, just turned the car on not honking or anything. David decides to come into the car with me, then I see Lucy walking over to her car to get some brownies, I see the women eating, they are giving me the signal if I want some , I say no, but Lucy still comes over to offer me some for the kids so I take one, & give it to David. We leave church get home change into our work out cloth, I try to sneak out side to write something on the card, but I hear the Law coming so ABORT ABORT mission, act cool, he he. We leave go walking come back, & remember I have a pen thrown on the floor to write in the card with, she decides to clean up the porch because when they come, & drop off Aiden the baby she baby-sits she doesn’t want them to see a mess. So I am thinking my pen where is it, we come inside she is taking a shower, so I sneak out, & take the card and fill it out with some loving words, all moochy words he he. Then I can think of how to give her the present I am thinking should I leave it on the dresser when I leave in the morning to work nah, she gets up to get the boys off to school. So I kiss her tell her bye, I Love you, God Bless you, pray for me today. Then while she is in the room getting the boys up I sneak the card out from under place mats on the dining room table, & I decide to put it in her driver side seat the card first then the gift, that way when she goes to drop the boys she can be surprised, and she was yay. So she emails me to tell me I really got her, I surprised her she wasn’t expecting it. & that was my point of view till that time of day.

Plain and simple

As my 5 yr old David was telling my wife, for some strange reason he just comes up to tells her “we like McCain because he believes God, And Rock Obama doesn’t”. If only it were that simple for us adults we have to make every situation harder than it really is. I don’t know where David gets off in talking about politics, but then he said his older bother Mike told him. Because they talk all night long instead of going to bed, hehe. Well like Forest Gump said, “That’s all I got to say, about that”.

JOB

Well back in December 24Th of 1999, I received Christ as my personal Savior. I had a job with this company driving the big rigs over the road all over the U.S.A, then I got saved, & the Holy Spirit told me I had to be home with my family, so I asked to get transferred to local work around the valley, so I got the job, I was on fire for God, but I was money hungry, believe me the money was good, my wife was a manager at the Whataburger so we had some serious dough. Well I couldn't see my self tithing ( giving God 10% which is nothing cause HE lets us keep 90%, & gives us the air we breath & LIFE, & strength to work) I was just tipping God giving what I thought the church would be happy with, but then I started backsliding listing to worldly music, getting away from God. Then in December the next year, I was so away from God, & I knew I had to get back on track, but just couldn't get myself to do it. Then I had an accident in Alamo, TX, construction was going on, & as I came over the over pass traffic was at a complete stop. I tries to stop I was fully loaded, & the truck, & trailer wouldn't stop. It was like in slow motion looking for a way out before I plow through a row of cars. I had a load of M.R.E's, going to McAllen. I managed to almost bump a B.F.I truck (garbage truck)onto the grass, but the truck wouldn't stop. I was almost to a complete stop when a minivan was the one van I had to clear to make a stop, I needed about a foot 12 inches, & I wouldn't have hit them, Yes I hit the back of there minivan, & broke a tail light. Yes just a taillight I remember Asking Jesus to help me so loud in the truck," Help me LORD oh Help ME" practically crying. I jumped out of the truck to see if the people were alright, & they were. Then it dawned on me what just happened it felt so surreal so like if I was dreaming waiting to wake up, but I didn't wake up it was real. I had to move the truck out of the way, I parked to the side, they moved also. We were waiting for the cops to show up, & the driver said he was going to walk down the road to get breakfast at a McDonald's near by, while the cops got there, I'm thinking man this guy is thinking about food at a time like this, then he even offered to buy me something, I said no of course. Then it was all over, had to deliver in Mcallen then back to harlingen. When I got back I was fired, then it really hit me, I can honestly say I was crying in the truck when I was cleaning out my truck. I tried to explain to them that the brakes didn't work on the truck, but they would not listen to me. I had proof I reported the breaks were not working properly for about 3 days before the accident. Then I had no Job no money. & it was Christmas, that's all I kept thinking man MY FAMILY what will they get for Christmas, how can anyone have no money for Christmas. It took that for God to get my attention, I got home & in the middle of what is now my dining room used to be the living room, I fell to my knees, gathered the Family, & got them to kneel & pray with me. I felt so bad I had let them down, most of all I knew I let Jesus down. I fell to my knees, & cried to the lord YES cried to the LORD up above to have Mercy on me, to forgive me for bringing this upon my family. But you know what Gods people, & family came through for us so good, the pastors little girl even lend us, yes lend us her stuffed Christmas tree for us to set up on the the dining room table, my family had such a wonderful Christmas that year I will always remember that. I cry even when I tell this story, because I know MY father in heaven is merciful, He loves me, no matter what I do, he will take care of HIS children, & HE will also chastise them. Don't wait for it to get this bad, don't wait for something to happen in your life for God to get your attention. I love Jesus I need HIM, in my life, my family had so many gifts that year, from family members, church members, friends, & all because HE is in control, and we act like spoiled brats having everything always wanting more, always wanting never happy with what we got. I can honestly say I tithe I am not bragging, & you know what you can never ever ever out give God HE owns it all, he will continue to shower you with blessing untold, blessing you don't even know you have. Like the Hymnal says count your blessing & see what God has done, count them name them one by one , you will see what you are blessed & don't even know it, you health, you family your house, your cars, your job, your ability to walk, your ability to talk, your ability to breathe, your ability to get up in the morning, open you eyes, to see, to hear, to smell, to taste, your blessing the people around you that love you, your kids that look up to you, your sibling that are watching every thing you do. Count them you can never out give God & never put a price on what HE has already given you. SO it was a blessing that I lost my Job because, I would pray for a Job where I can be in the house of God on Sundays all day & Wednesday's, & still be able to help out in church on Saturday's, & I still have my needs met financially, HE is good, isn't HE, HE is awesome, HE is MY LORD, & SAVIOUR. thank you for your time i know its along one but some people wont read it. But wait there is more, the Texas workforce from the employment office reviewed my case we had a court hearing over the phone, & I won, by GOD GRACE of course, & they gave me a lump some of about 3 thousand dollars, I told you, you can never out give God HE just keeps pouring out the blessings, HE is so AWESOME.

Last night

Last night I couldn’t sleep don’t know what it was just woke up with a bad chest pain on my left side, of course you start to think Heart attack. I was getting angry at my wife for telling me to lets go to the doctor, I just wanted to be left alone I was so uncomfortable I was just moving my left arm around in circle to make it go away. It wasn’t like a sharp pain it was more like a soreness, just bothering me. I still have some soreness on my left arm, but if my wife wants me to go check it out I will.
I was so proud of myself for walking last night; I actually kept up with my wife if you know how she walks she walks pretty fast. We did 2 miles non stop, and then we went to get healthy groceries, watching all calories, carbs, & aspartame in drinks. I felt good till I was fast asleep last night; when I was awaken by this uncomfortable feeling. My calves were all tightening up for some reason I think they were just sore. I started praying like crazy to make this feeling go away, I was the one that woke my wife up telling her my chest hurt, and then I am getting mad at her sorry baby, I Love You. She even got dressed, & went to the store to get me some aspirin or some Bayer, I just know my wife was giving them to me & I was to take them. I didn’t even stop to think about her & the kids, I was being selfish. You as a person have an impact on many lives & don’t even know it. I don’t know what my wife would do without me, of course in getting her life back together, but I wouldn’t want to leave her so unprepared. I know she is strong, & will find a way, but I still need to think more about her, & stop being so selfish. I love my boys, & I know they know I love them, but my wife I have to show her more that I love her, not just saying it. Love is an action, we have to show it. I fall so short in this if you could pray for me to show her how much I love her, & not take her for granted like I always do. And about dying, I am not afraid, I know where I will spend eternity, but I am afraid of how I will leave my family behind. We will see how this goes or what happens.

in my head today

Today as I was working on the bus. SOrry about the Grammer, Got spell check though.

Just left work going to mother in laws house to get my tools from the Laws car, but wait I need my church keys, dang it I have to go home & get them. Getting my tools from the car& what there are my church keys, man I love my wife. Calling her, Hey baby just calling to tell you your awesome for thinking of getting the keys for me, Bye I love you be careful God Bless You. Going to church, hm my truck is all shiny, wait don't get to vain, just like how the Lord gave it to you he can take it away. Wow someone has the gate open from church, getting the supplies of the truck into the refrigerator so they can be cold when the people come to work & cut the grass. Doing radiator flush on the bus, oops forgot to get stuff from Auto Zone gonna go back. OK workers will show up anytime now, I will just go inside & tell Mrs. Kim & Lucy I will be right back, OK Lucy I will check your oil, No oil in truck Lucy you need oil, Que Nina. Buying the stuff for the church, OK Lucy you owe the church 8 bucks, OK when I get back people will have started cutting the grass, getting back, hm, where could these people be why doesn't anyone come, wait a minute be more compassionate maybe they had plans, maybe they do have other stuff to do, putting oil in Lucy's truck, What check engine light still on, OH, disconnect , positive battery cable for a few seconds to reboot computer on cars, a little trick i learned, whale it worked, man it feels good working on cars. OK When are the people gonna show up it is already 12 David has a game, Lucy tells me something about the grass OK OK i know it needs to get done, i will do it, i will miss Davids games I have to do this , i guess no one will show up, what is the point don't even announce it, no one shows up any way OK calm down don't get hateful, OK OK, people have lives outside the church, yeah but what kinda of lives who cares worry about your life & how your living for God, stop looking upon other people what do you want a super Christian symbol on your chest, your crazy don't forget who your doing it for. OK OK I will pray for them instead of all these thought running in head, love them pray for them, they need your prayers, too. OK but yeah they miss church & once they do it it is so easy to do it again. Who cares worry about your self & how your living, are you living for God, OK you can wake up Early to got to work but you cant get up to go to Sunday school to visitation, to work Saturday , OK OK OK your starting to look upon them again focus focus, look upon HIM,. Remember why your here, Man it hot sure wish I had someone to help me, I AM HERE, thank you Lord, I am sorry for starting to get bitter I love you Jesus, why do you love me I am nothing Nothing worthless human being , but you still loved me thank you Lord for loving me, I want to love like you love Jesus Help me I need you in my every day life , everyday walk, every day talk , thank you Lord I need you , help me help me. OK OK Ask Logan to get you the key for the tractor to get it started, thanks Logan , what where is the Tractor, OK maybe the Laiklams have it under their carport, no its not here, OK maybe around the house, nope not there either OK call Mrs Kim, Mrs Kim do you know where the tractor is, I'm not kidding, no ma am its not there. empty feeling inside so ugly feeling home sick, feeling violated getting angry at the low down people that can steal from a church whats that Luke they cut the fence, perfect, calling the Law hey baby can you call the police, they stole the tractor & i need them to come & file a report because I know they cant do nothing. OK cops are here filing out report my age, my height , my weight, my address, wait a minute I am the victim here, don't say that keep it inside, yes sir , good answer, looking around the neighborhood this tractor cant go very far, maybe its in that uhaul looking thing stupid apartment look like a ghetto around here, betcha its in there, I want so bad to find it, its not even the churches tractor, the laiklams bought that tractor it's their tractor, so bad so bad, stupid people wont ever stop , have you prayed for the, no, they are just so bad, how were you , sorry God, Lord forgive them for what they did , but Lord I would really want that tractor back in the laiklams house, find it Lord find it, please, I pray for the people that took it may they have some conviction bout stealing it, some compassion about taking it, they can see we are not a fancy church why do they keep doing these things to us, maybe You should witness to those people in the apartment ever time every Saturday, that is what you can do. OK Lord help me to do this Lord help me i need you. OK called preacher about it, he will pray, called D, she is at Davids Game, called Lucy, to pray called J, he was busy, don't bother him,calling Eva OK no answer just leave a message, calling Zeke no answer called big Carlos, he is handing out water & ice to IKE victims leave him alone don't bother him with this, OK leaving going to Davids game, called little Carlos, praying for him , heart is beating fast & heavy what will I say will he answer, OK he didn't answer, but I will leave him a message. getting to Davids game, go baby go. that's enough from me today bye

Pray

As I went out today at about 10:00 AM to get out of the office, I went around to the back of the warehouse to be alone with God. As I came around the warehouse I see all the water being pumped into some drains out back, the water from the recent storm that brought us a lot of rain. This water gets stuck and is still, therefore creating a really good breeding ground for Texas Size mosquitos, our state bird just kidding. Well the cool north breeze was blowing not to hard, but a good pace felt good on the face. As I sat there listening to the cars go by on the freeway wondering where they could be going, I was thinking about what the Lord Jesus has done in my life. All of a sudden I got home sick, like a little kid home sick. I started thinking of my parents’ house, of when I was smaller. It felt weird I had to ask my self , “self why are you feeling this way” just kidding, I just started to pray for my parents they are lost, & are in need of a Saviour, so if you could please pray for them. My prayer is that one day the Lord let me preach in Spanish, & that my Dad would come, & hear Gods Holy word. See my dad will come around the church to help me with things that need to get done, but he won’t come to the services, I guess because they are in English. So I blog this to say that My dad was in my heart today, & I would appreciate your prayers. Look around you, where are your parents, are they saved? your brother & sisters? I just say get to praying, HE can save them, before it is to late.

Culture

The other day on our way to Wallbangers (Greatest Burgers Ever), we stopped at the Outlets in Mercedes, TX. Lucy bought some candy apples with Hot & Sweet Chili powder if that makes any sense to some of you; also known as Lucas or another brand Trechas. Lucy got a Rocky Road candy apple it was really good. Well I just thought about our Culture, & that we have to make everything spicy. Or on Sunday its Barbacoa or Menudo, when we went to Louisiana with our friends the people there had never heard of Potato & Egg Tacos. Just like we had never heard of Boudin, or Cracklins (My Favorite), we all have different cultures can you think of something that make your culture unique? Like on birthday’s we have Piñatas. Just thinking out loud well in typing, hehe.

Just a Post

Well I haven't blogged in a while have really been busy, due to summer being our peak season at work. Well today I was talking with my brother from another mother on this Hurricane coming towards us. I told him I was praying it away, but he told me something that really hit in the heart about praying For God to weaken the storm, not to pray it away to someone else, to other countries that don't get the help we do. I t made me think of the way I was praying, I was praying All selfish I guess, but I am praying in a different way, Thanks Bro. This Hurricane season has really been active, I worry about my family, then my house,. but you what, God is in control a HE is my Father in heaven and some times , like times like these. When we are so busy with work we forget who is in control, who our Jesus is. We have a connection with HIM & sometimes we don't, or even forget to use it. Just a quick blog to let you know whats in my heart today.

Epaphroditis Mission

Here is Sis Pat front of the warehouse.

Inside the missions quarter where missionaries & pastors stay.

Carport where supplies used to be.

Inside the warehouse Half the roof is gone. I pray your heart & prayers are with this mission work we (Grace Baptist Church, Harlingen, TX) support Sis Pat in here work, she is widowed to Bro Tino Mendez. Our church supports her work for $50 dollars a month, but she will need more than that. Her ministry is to supply need of Pastors & preacher & missionaries in Mexico or anywhere in the U.S. If they need literature or bibles or whatever she has in here warehouse she lets them have it. She also had food & office supplies. Most of everything was destroyed & insurance wont cover it. This Mission work relies on us the saved in Christ Jesus to help in someway. Gracebaptistharlingen.com will try to help some, will have to talk to our pastor & church members, if we can pick up an offering to help her out in someway financially. Please again be in prayer for the rebuilt of this mission. Bro. Roy Dale Kincaid was over there this morning with Bro. Rupert & Bro. Luke tearing off the metal that was not salvageable. Bro. John from Pennsylvania, & Iwere there also picking up the trash, & piling it together. Now she will need lumber to rebuild, & metal roofing supplies to get a roof back on her warehouse. I pray if you could help financially, & please pray for the finances,& especially help to come in to fix the roof.

Roof

This is my roof after Hurricane Dolly, & we are still waiting for the insurance to see how much they are going to help us with this. I have had 2 different companies come by to see it to give me an estimate, but it will come out about to $2000 to $2500 is my guess they give me estimates but they always say we still have to see the plywood & how much supplies we will need. So if you can pray for us on this issue, & pray in the money for the repairs. The insurance has already been out here, but no word from them on the settlement check to see if it will cover what I need. The insurance already send me one check for a water leak I had on the roof from the 3rd picture down. They send me some money to fix it, but then they were saying that money was for all the roof, which will not even cover the supplies I need. I thought about doing it myself, but it seems the Law doesn't want me to try to do it. Just pray please, I don't know what to do anymore, my house has tarps all over it just in case it rains. I am tired of seeing my little house like this, I want it fixed already.

No Respect

Today I had to go to the church some one tried to steal our window unit from the fellowship hall(annex building). It really aggravated me I was all ticked off that people don't even have respect for the house of God. Some one pulled on the a/c & shattered the window, but the glass came down on them because I saw blood stain on the front steps of the church. I was so mad they have stolen our stickers from the bus, the inspection & state sticker, so we carry them in our hands when we move the bus around town. Then they shoot out our windows in the fellowship hall with a bb gun. & to top it off they stole our weed eater from church. How can people be like that, I just don't get it. Even when I was lost I had respect for a church, no matter what kind of church it was there was some respect for it. Don't know what to do anymore please pray with me for these people to move away I know its the people from the apartment from in back of the church , but we can't catch them. I pray that God take care of these people, or just allow us to buy. & build somewhere else, I am really getting tired of this. I get so mad I want to get in the flesh,.. but then realize I am taking my anger out on my wife & kids. IT just makes me so mad. What can we do please pray with me if you don't know how to pray ask the Holy Spirit to guide you. I have to get to a point, & calm down, & thank God for them not taking anything else or breaking in when someone is there. Sometimes even the Christian have no respect for Gods house, so why would the world have respect for it, I don't know I am just rambling, just pray please.

The Zone

Here we are on the go karts, sorry I didn't edit.